Carl Tyler's Blog

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and I had good reason, I've basically been really busy with the move. There are a few lessons that I think you learn everytime you do a move, and everytime you never learn from the previous time, they are:

• No matter how much you think you can get in your car, you will always need at least one more trip
• To avoid being sued I word this carefully UHAUL "probably" are the worst company in the world
• If you buy boxes and packing tape, you will run out of tape or boxes first, the two will never run out at the same time.
• UHAUL "probably" couldn't arrange a pissup in a brewery
• You discover food in the kitchen that should have been eaten in the last millenium
• The item/tool you need first at your new location, is always at the back of the truck or in the bottom of the biggest box
• Hhm, did I mention that UHAUL "probably" have the worst rental system in the whole Universe?
• It's hard work, I am cream crackered (translated that is Cockney rhyming slang for knackered, which means tired)

OK so you may sense that I am not impressed with UHAUL, well your senses are firing on all cylinders if that is the how you read it. Now why do I say bad things about them? Well it all started on a glorious blue skied Thursday morning. UHAUL had told me they would call on Wednesday night to let me know where I would be picking the truck up, remember with UHAUL you don't pick up the truck where you rent it, you pick the Truck up from wherever it takes UHAUL's fancy within a 25 miles radius. Makes total sense for UHAUL, but not for customers, anyway Wednesday night UHAUL call to ask me if I'd be happy to take a truck with a trailer that would give me the same space as the truck I had booked, I said this was fine as long as I could pick it up at the UHAUL at the end of my street, OK says the lady on the other end and says she'll call back when they have details of where to pick up the truck.

Thursday morning it's 9 AM, no news from UHAUL, no indication of where I should pick up the truck so I decide to give them a call. "Hello Mr Tyler, we're still trying to find you a truck, we will call you later", totally understandable, as it's not like I booked it a week in advance or anything, oh wait I did. Hhhm, frustration level 2 (rated 1 - 10) as I was expecting to be filling a truck with boxes by now. 10AM, still no word from UHAUL decide to give them another call, "Hello Mr Tyler, yes we have your truck, and I can just say it was quite a struggle to find you one, the truck is in Hyde Park, MA", quite a struggle I'm thinking, the UHAUL at the end of my street has a car park full of them! Anyway, Hyde Park is 15 miles away so I get in my car to go pick the truck up. The guy in Hyde Park was actually a nice friendly guy, who later it turned out hoodwinked me by saying the truck had to be returned with 3/8 full, but on the receipt had written the truck was half full, yes I know don't just sign it where they ask you to, read the damn thing, another lesson learnt. I chat to the UHAUL guy a bit more confirming where I'll be dropping of the truck, excellent news, there is a UHAUL location 500 yards from the new place, so I wont need a friend to shuffle me between their and my car when I drop it off (this is an important discussion remember it).

11.30Am start packing the UHAUL truck, so far so good no problems, UHAUL truck is just sitting their being filled with my junk, the perfect use for a UHAUL truck. 3.30PM Truck is 80% full, The only big thing I couldn't move by myself was the sofa, so need a friend to help me move that. 4.00PM My friend arrives and we drive back down to Hyde Park in their car to get my car, so that they can drive my car up to New Hampshire for me whilst I drive the truck. Get stuck in traffic so takes just over an hour.

7.20PM Finish packing UHAUL and leave for New Hampshire, with friend in my car following behind. 9.20PM having stopped for dinner on the way arrive at new place and start unpacking the truck (Big thank you to Peyton and his Dad who helped unpack, this not only saved my back, but probably a good few hours of work.). 12.30AM (Friday) found a pub within crawling distance which when I entered I knew I had taken the average age up to about 22, not sure everyone in this pub was 21, but I don't really mind as it was quite pleasing to the eye. 2AM crashed.

OK so that wasn't so bad, so what's the deal with UHAUL? Well you remember when I said that the UHAUL guy and I had discussed how I would be dropping it off at my new town, and this all sounded great, well the instructions I had were to call them up Friday morning for directions on where to drop it off, so 8.30AM I call up UHAUL and ask for directions,
"Yes Mr Tyler, we don't want you to drop the truck of their anymore, we want you to drop it off at Portsmouth",
"I'm sorry I say, that's not what I agreed, why should I drop it off at Portsmouth and who's going to give me a ride back home?" (frustration level 3),
"because Mr Tyler someone in Portsmouth needs the truck",
"well then, can I suggest you have them pick it up the same way I did yesterday",
"No Mr Tyler it doesn't work that way, we will give you the extra mileage allowance to get it to Portsmouth" "Why not? It worked that way yesterday, let me explain this again, I agreed to drop it of at the UHAUL 500 yards away, I'm dropping it off 500 yards away"
"Sorry Mr Tyler if you do that we will charge you $100 as we will need to move the truck, do you have trouble with the English Language, I am explaining that you need to drop it off in Portsmouth" (Frustration level just jumped to 6) "Could I speak to your supervisor please as I don't believe you should be speaking to any customer that way, and I agreed to drop it off at my local UHAUL and that is what I intend to do"
"You really do have a problem understanding English don't you, they will tell you the exact same thing I just told you" (frustration level 7)
"That's fine, I look forward to hearing it from them"
===Connected to supervisor===
"Hello Mr Tyler, why can't you understand this? We need you to drop of the Truck at Portsmouth, or I can give you two more alternate locations"
"HHmm, not sure why you can't understand this, I agreed on this town when I picked it up, and the two alternate locations and Portsmouth are not the agreed location, so I suggest you work it out"
"Sorry that's not happening, you can't drop it off at your agreed destination as the location already has their maximum number of vehicles allowed under their agreement with their town" Can you smell the same Bulls*@t I can smell? (Frustration level 8)
"Can I speak to your supervisor please?"
"I don't have a supervisor" (Frustration level 9)
"Who reviews your work?"
"That would be the Vice President"
"OK I'll speak to him/her please"
"They're very busy"
"That's good because we both have something in common then, a good starting point"
"OK putting you through"
===Connected to Mr Pepin "supposed" VP of Marketing at UHAUL for Maine and New Hampshire===
"Hello Mr Tyler, why wont you return the truck to Portsmouth?"
"Because that isn't what I agreed with UHAUL and how do you intend me to get home?"
"You can get a cab or the bus" (Frustration level 10)
"Will you pay?"
"No but we will give you the extra mileage allowance on the truck"
"OK Mr Pepin, let me ask you a question, do you really believe this is good service?"
"well first of all, no one should have agreed to let you specify where you want to drop the vehicle of and you should take that up with the person that rented you the vehicle, and if you wanted good service you should call Walmart" (Frustration level off the bloody scale, these people are morons, these people deserve an enema with a big bristly hairbrush, I want to scream down the phone what a complete and utter wanker this guy is, but having worked on the other end of the phone I know it has little effect.
"OK well I am going to take your name and number now, so I can speak to someone else after I have calmed down"
"You do that Mr Tyler, and please return the truck to Portsmouth" Click
So I'm a little pissed off, and decide that I have a plan I will make it so that the truck wont start and the F*%ckers can come and pick it up themselves, no longer my issue. As it turns out the damn thing wouldn't start anyway so I didn't have to sabotage it at all. I call up UHAUL tell them of my situation and they give me a reference number and say somebody will call me later to get my exact location etc. I made sure to ask that I wont be charged for an extra day as the truck wont start and wont be back on time, "that's right Mr Tyler, you have a reference number now so you are all set."
Two hours go by and no call, so I call up UHAUL to ask about my call that I haven't received, "Mr Tyler that number says it's out of service", "really? That's interesting I'm chatting to you on it right now, hold on let me try calling it from my other phone, you hear that? That's Caller waiting, so it looks like the phone is OK.", "well it doesn't matter now as we have you on the phone, someone will be out within half an hour" 15 minutes later, the guy from the UHAUL down the street arrives, fortunately he can't start it either and flattens the battery in the process, at least now they can't say I sabotaged it. While he sets up the jump leads we start chatting and he explains how his wife is blind and has a seeing eye dog, so I explained how we used to puppy walk the guide dogs, all of a sudden I have a new friend at UHAUL, Ron loves me, he's out to fix my truck and make everything good. I explained my situation to him and he said he'll sort it all out. Ron makes his calls, and comes back to me to explain that it's not a problem and I'll be dropping of the truck down the street. Woo hoo result. blood pressure drops significantly as realization kicks in that everyone associated with UHAUL aren't total morons.
About to return truck realize that the nice guy in Hyde Park screwed me on the amount of gas in the truck, oh well put it down to experience and relief that I am now finally done with UHAUL, or that's as they'd have believe. 3 hours later I get a call from UHAUL,
"Mr Tyler, we see you haven't returned the truck yet, will you be keeping it out for another day?",
"Uh, I returned the truck 3 hours ago, it was broken down, they fixed it, I dropped it off",
"Where did you drop it off Mr Tyler? We don't have any record of it being dropped of in Portsmouth"
"I dropped it of with the UHAUL guys who repaired it down the road", "Mr Tyler, you were supposed to drop it off in Portsmouth" (frustration level 13),
"The guys down the road said not to worry about it and they made some calls and took it",
"Do you know who did that Mr Tyler?",
"YES the UHAUL guys; listen very carefully as I will not be saying this again, I have been accused of not understanding English, I have been told that should have gone to Walmart for better service, I have had enough of this rubbish, you go call your guys and you figure it out, it's your truck, your company and you're pissing me off way too much have a nice day" click

The saga continues, today I see that UHAUL are trying to stiff me for 100 bucks (returning the truck to incorrect location) and some other charge for 53 dollars something which no one knows what it's for (probably road side service for a faulty truck), Obviously I have told AMEX that these charges should not have been made and to do their investigative work. So be warned, if you have a choice between the bird flu and dealing with UHAUL, take the flu, it's got to be a more healthy experience. Oh and do me a favour, if you get the opportunity, bad mouth those morons at UHAUL all you can. <